Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Hurting for our Kids


The bond that God created between a mother and a child is so amazing. We feel their joy, we feel their pain. We want to guard them from the hurts of this life, even though we know we can't and that they need to experience those hurts just like we have.

What strikes me is that when one of my children is going through a difficult time, it causes me to reflect on that one great loss they have endured. The loss that I still at the age of 39 have not had to live through -- the loss of their father. My son is struggling with the pains of being a boy. He has a baseball coach who puts winning above the spirit of the child. And my child is not making the cut, and therefore is spending entire games on the bench. Mike loves baseball, sometimes so much that it makes me crazy. The boy would eat, drink and sleep baseball if I would allow it. But the fact of the matter is -- he has not had a dad to play with him, to teach him, to take the interest in him -- like these other boys have had. I have played catch with him when I could. But I'm a girl, am not very athletic, and until last year, was a fulltime working solo mom of two. Not a whole lot of time for catch.

Watching his frustration, feeling like I want to help but I can't, just hurts. It's only little league -- I do not want to be one of those over-zealous parents. I know he is not as good as those other boys. But to see the look of disappointment on his face breaks my heart.

He has a really good step-dad. But it still brings back to me the pain that his birth-dad is not here, and has not been here for a really long time. What would he be telling Mike if he were here? What words of wisdom would he have for his son? How would he help build our son's confidence? I suppose he would be doing just what I am doing, and what Brad is doing. Just telling him we are proud of him. Telling him we support whatever decision he makes regarding this stupid baseball team. Reminding him that this is just another life lesson, and that life is more than just baseball.

If Ed could say anything to his children, I think this song pretty much sums it all up:

1 comment:

Marsha said...

It is so difficult to remember that when our children hurt--character is being built. M is a great kid--he has compassion and heart--something MANY children never attain. YOU are a great mom and Brad a great step-dad. Know he will work through this and be OK--
Love ya,
Marsha